Jan
28
Getting Older Ain't for Sissies
The weirdest thing about getting older is...your peer group starts dying. Relationships that have spanned decades suddenly vanish.
There's a strange routine that happens when people die...and it seems really tragic to me. People recognize how someone dying deserves attention. Every culture offers some recognition of those who are left behind. People feel a responsibility to show up to demonstrate their support...then they leave. It's as if it was a social visit. But it wasn't. It was a wake or a graveside service or a funeral.
People who are grieving need to be present with those offering them support - not just a visit, but in an ongoing way. Social mores that require "not making a pest of yourself" would require staying gone for the customary amount of time until the next visit.
There's a strange routine that happens when people die...and it seems really tragic to me. People recognize how someone dying deserves attention. Every culture offers some recognition of those who are left behind. People feel a responsibility to show up to demonstrate their support...then they leave. It's as if it was a social visit. But it wasn't. It was a wake or a graveside service or a funeral.
People who are grieving need to be present with those offering them support - not just a visit, but in an ongoing way. Social mores that require "not making a pest of yourself" would require staying gone for the customary amount of time until the next visit.
